Professor Johnson’s Gift to You for Christmas 2013

The Top-Five Things I Hope You Learned This Semester that have NOTHING to do with Biology

5.      In the real world, a ‘group project’ means that all team members work together to produce a final product.  Not everyone has the same strengths, but all members have something of value to offer.  Your outcome (in this class – your grade) of a group project is usually based on your individual contribution to the project’s creation and presentation.

4.      It is rude & distracting to the entire class to talk when others are speaking.  This is something that mature adults know and practice.  This applies to when the instructor is talking or when classmates are attempting to have a class discussion.  You may believe that whispering to your classmate in the back of the room is so quiet that no one will hear you, but you are incorrect.  Few things are more discouraging than having something important to say and realizing that the people you are talking to are choosing not to listen. 

3.      You look foolish when you ask a question that was answered 5 seconds before when you were busy texting, facebooking, or whispering to your neighbor.

2.      When your professor makes comments and suggestions on your paper, you should read those comments and change the paper as they have requested before re-submitting the assignment.  If you only submit a paper once before grading, the comments from one paper apply to the next assignment.

1.      You are capable of more than you know and believe.  You have the ability to read and learn many things on your own.  Your instructors want to help you with things you need more help on – not spoon feed you every piece of information you might possibly need to know.  Thomas Edison, one of the greatest American inventors ever, was adamant that his success was not due to some amazing intellect.  He often told people that it was “90% due to hard work.”  The great news is this is something that is completely within each individual’s control. 

It has been a great privilege to spend this semester with you in Introduction to Biology.  Please feel free to stop by my office and chat when you return in the Spring!  Have a wonderful and restful semester break and Christmas!

 

It's a Good Day to Die Hard

Let's walk through the past week, shall we?

Monday - Wake up and take T3 to school.  Come home and frantically pick up house until the cleaning lady arrives.  Go to school with T1 and T2.  Spend 1 hour going over the days school work.  Go teach a class of 23 college students.  Come back and spend more time with T1 and T2 (they did not make much progress in my absence).  Go to office and grade papers, work on a literature review, and answer emails.  Pick up T3 from school.  Work on school work with all 3 kids.  Take T1 to gymnastics practice.  Help T3 get ready for football game.  Talk with husband on, while alternating house work and grading papers.  Talk with husband on the phone about the logistics of the evening.  Take T3 to football game.  Leave football game at halftime and go with T2 to soccer game that I am coaching.  Come home and eat a sandwich.  Grade Math from T1 and T2.  Look over lesson plans and activities for the next day.  Go to bed and hope to sleep.

Okay - I don't think I can make it through the remaining days.  I can tell you all the days went pretty much the same except there was a soccer game with football practice on Tuesday, I taught a class on Wednesday night, and we only had soccer on Friday and Saturday nights.

There has been little adult interaction aside from logistics.  I don't have time to socialize during lunch at work.  I can't socialize with other parents at the soccer games because I am coaching.  I don't have any friends that call, text, or email to check on me during the week.  This place has been extremely lonely.

Just for good measure, let's throw in a trip to the doctor for a sinus infection that has been hounding me for the past 4 weeks. 

I'm tired.  I feel really awful.  In this condition, I wonder if any of this is making a difference.

But I feel at peace - I know I am doing the things that God has called me to do.  And, maybe more importantly, I know without a doubt that I am dying to myself.  Some days, this 'dying to self' is excruciating - probably because I fight against it and try to live and serve in my own strength.  Other days, I am just spent.

So, despite the loneliness, the exhaustion, the illness - I am thankful.  Thankful that I am being made more into the image of Jesus.  Thankful that I have been given the opportunity to teach and serve.  Thankful that God isn't finished with me yet.

I'm sure that I will at times be impatient with this process and other times I will think I am 'finished'.   I need to be reminded that He will not be finished with me this side of Heaven - He loves me too much.  So I need to embrace where He has me and empty myself of confidence in myself.  This post is one reminder to myself that..... It's a Good Day to Die Hard.

This is Not a Re-Run

I'm sitting at the dining room table alone with my iPad and computer.  There are 2 un-graded math assignments from my now home-schooled-kids beside me and an entire house that needs cleaning.  But instead of grading the papers, getting up to clean, or even pulling out my book to do some more reading, I am staring at social media.  I feel a little paralyzed and the only word that keeps going through my mind is "tired".

I think if you saw me at this moment, I might look the way I did 12 years ago when I gave birth to my second child in 11 months.  I have few memories of the following months as I did what had to be done - basically in survival mode.  I looked okay, but the weight of life was heavy.

I have had no moments of real quiet during any afternoon this week.  Practices and school work have kept things loud and buzzing.  I feel like I have worked at SOMETHING every second from 9 am to 11 pm, and most of those things were not what I had planned.  Physically, I feel a little off, but mentally - well, I'm just not sure.

The first 4 days of homeschooling has been interesting, to say the least.  There has only been 1 breakdown on the part of a child, and I was proud of being gentle yet firm in expressing my instructions and expectations.  We are moving through our books and curriculum at the recommended pace with little problem.  Overall, I think this is going to work out well.

So why am I seconds away from tears myself?  Why do I feel run over by a truck and mentally exhausted?  I have 3 more weeks until the real craziness of life takes over with work and sports and school for the 3rd grader.  I am seeing more and more that learning at home with me is what both of my kids need to correct deficiencies in their life skills.  This early start is allowing us to get ahead (one of my favorite things) and I expected to slip into this new routine with the older kids now and make small adjustments when mid-August arrived. 

But this has not been the reality.

Being a working mother of 3 children with their own activities is very hectic.  It is even worse when you have no family around to help you out.  Even though I have not been able to participate in women's Bible studies or be invited to "Girls Nights", I have had the thought that if I REALLY WANTED TO, I could squeeze that in.  I guess the reality is setting in that EVEN IF I WANT TO, there is not going to be time for any additions while I fill all of roles I must fill, in the way I believe will glorify God.

I don't want to go back to survival mode.  I don't want to live feeling weighed down and perpetually tired.  Only Jesus can give me joy in this place He has called me - as wife, mother, professor, and now homeschooling parent.  Perhaps he will use people around me as His hands and feet, but maybe not.  I'm thankful that He is showing me that this is all too big for me.  Now I must let Him do it - through me - rather than hope I can do it all in my own power and strength.

It's Time for a Posture Check

My current running app likes to ask me for a "Posture Check" at least once per workout.  Sometimes this is really irritating, but today, it made me think in an entirely different way.

In a recent post I complained about how many people chose to share their political opinions on Facebook in a rude, demeaning, or condescending way.  This holds true on whether I agree with the 'side' the person is defending in their post. 

There is another approach taken by others that is more troubling to me - those that say "this is what I believe, but you believe something else.  Both are okay.  Its no big deal."  These posts and statements are not talking about a favorite flavor of ice cream or most enjoyable television show, but about serious moral questions.

So today, I was pleasantly surprised to see this post in my Facebook feed comparing the difference between POSTURE and POSITION.  I think he sums up well the difference between the two, although I believe both are important. 

If your POSTURE is that you will argue and ridicule those who disagree with you, your witness and relationships are damaged - regardless of whether you are correct!  On the other side, if your POSTURE is one of extreme flexibility bordering on relativism, your relationships are not damaged, but I still think your witness is minimized.  As Christians, we are clearly called to certain standards - not because our salvation depends on it.  Rather, the One who layed down His life for us knows what is best for us and we seek to honor Him through all of our actions.

What might it look like to hold firm to your position while maintaining a posture that glorifies God in our encounters with others?  I believe it hinges on a Biblical understanding of man.  All of us are made in the image of God and have value, dignity, and worth.  Nothing can take away from that position, and we need to recognize and proclaim this, maybe most especially with those with whom we disagree. 

The next time I open my running app on my iPhone, it will again remind me to do a posture check.  This is appropriate because this is something we will need to check regularly - daily, maybe hourly - both in our physical body and heart.  Perhaps with practice we can form a habit of a proper spiritual POSTURE toward our God and our fellow man.  This would be a change I would welcome.

I Can't Look Away from the Trainwreck....

Hello Facebook Friend - I'm blogging today wondering why you continue to post certain topics. 

I don't really care what you are eating for breakfast, lunch, snack, or dinner.

I don't think your children are the most amazing things in the world, and your posts will not convince me of this.

I don't want to play any games, so please stop inviting me to do so.

I don't care that YOU are playing games or that you just got a high score.

I don't like seeing opinions presented in a ridiculing manner or laced with profanity.  This would include politics, education, or health care.

But the bigger question I have is - WHY CAN I NOT CLOSE THE STUPID WEBSITE AND STOP READING THESE THINGS I DON'T CARE ABOUT?

I have never had lots of friends and I have never been popular.  This has not changed through high school, college, graduate school, mommy-hood, to the present.  I find myself in the same pattern of those times - on the outside looking in.  I was physically THERE - I heard the conversation - but I was not really A PART of it all.  If I had been absent, not much would have changed for the ones who were. 

So I 'act' on Facebook the way I always have - listening - but not being heard, watching - but not being seen.  Deep down I have the same desire and hope I have always had.  Someday, someone will look over, see my sad lonely self on the sideline and invite me to participate in life. 

Albert Einstein is credited as saying that insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.  Given what I have shared here, I would certainly qualify as insane in this arena.  But what is a Biblical response to all of this?  We are made for relationship, but ultimately that relationship should be with Jesus.  People will always disappoint us - He never will.  He always sees and hears me - these are the truths I need remind myself of in moments of sadness.  And I don't need to be connected to Facebook or other social media to be 'followed' by Him.

Graduation Insights from a Faculty Member and Mom

This past Friday and Saturday I was privileged to attend 2 graduation ceremonies (okay - I was required to go as a faculty member but it is fun to see former students on such a momentous occasion).  I have been known to carry a book to graduation, especially since I hear the same speaker/ speech twice in 2 days.  This year, I didn't crack my book - in either ceremony!  The speaker talked about sacrifice - as he defined "choosing to suffer".  He reminded us that sacrifice exponentially increases the outcome of whatever it is attached to.  Sacrifice it not moral and can be used in any cause - good or bad.

To explain why this address had such an impact on me, you need a little back story.  I am in my first year of my true career.  I have been working at a job I love - teaching college students - for 8 years now.  I have worked as the lab coordinator for 2 years.  However, this is the first year I have been on a full-time contract doing what I thought I would when I applied to graduate school many years ago.  This opportunity is exciting.  I think of not only what I can do to be better at my job, but also what I should do to advance my career.  This has lead to thoughts of research, thoughts of returning to graduate school to finish my Ph.D., thoughts of more activities at work.

In the midst of these thoughts it has become clear that my middle schoolers are struggling.  One has no free time - it is all homework and gymnastics practice.  The other is on a grade roller-coaster - either make perfect grades or struggling to turn in any assignments.  In all of this, I see a lack of care in their work.  Due dates appear to be suggestions and there is no consistent rule for when late work is no big deal and when it is not even accepted.  After a lot of prayer and discussion, we have decided to home school these 2 for the next academic year.

So thinking about advancing my career while being responsible for the education of a 12 and 13 year old feels overwhelming.  So while I sat in the audience at graduation,  I thought about what the speaker was saying about sacrifice.  I had a real sense that God is calling me to sacrifice for my kids' education right now.  They need me.  God has big plans for these children of mine - plans that require them to have life skills like meeting deadline and paying attention to detail.  These skills are lost on them right now and I have the opportunity to sacrifice my desires for a while to make sure they are ready for what God has in store for them.

There will be time for other sacrifices - those that will allow me to finish my Ph.D. and apply for promotion at work.  But I need to remind myself that now is not that time.  God is directing my path, and I feel that this is the sacrifice He is calling me to right now.

I am a "Miserable Comforter"

After 3 years of “read through the Bible in a year” plans, I decided to do the Chronological Plan for 2013.  I was a little surprised when the plan sent me to the book of Job right after Noah left the Ark!  For the past week I have been reading the bad council of Zophar, Bildad, and Eliphaz to the suffering Job.  “Surely you are being punished for your wickedness!” they continue to declare to him while Job insists on his innocence.

Each day after reading the accusations of Job’s visitors, I am left with a sense of thankfulness.  Above all, I’m thankful that although I am as sinful as they are describing, God does not treat me as my sins deserve due to the finished work of Christ.  But if I am honest with myself, I am thankful that I would never say such things to a suffering person.  As I type this, it smacks with more of a Pharisaical hypocrite than it normally does in my head (Lord, I thank you that I am not like this tax collector…), but God in His mercy has orchestrated all of this to teach me something new.

There are suffering people around me.  It seems like more than normal.  I don’t know if this is because I am paying better attention or if it is really the case.  As I am patting myself on the back that I would not be so insensitive and wrong as Zophar, Bildad, and Eliphaz, God has shown me that I am just like them.  I just speak a different language of insensitivity.  Rather than accuse the suffering of being wicked, I accuse them in my mind of other REASONS why they find themselves in their current situation.  Your health is poor because you have not lost weight/ exercised/ gone to the doctor.  Your relationships are bad because you are selfish/ demanding/ no fun/ a bad listener.  Your illness is due to cellular malfunction (I could explain it to you)/ bad luck (let me tell you about mutations).  Surely this isn’t as bad as Job’s miserable comforters, right?   Because what I am saying in my head is really true, right?

But why is my mind going there?  I have been convicted today that all of these reasons in my mind are there so I can check off that I am NOT like that.  I am in good health because I have exercised and gone to the doctor.  I am not selfish or demanding.  And because I BELIEVE this about myself, I am saying that I am in control of my health, relationships, and whatever else you would like to include.   I think that is what Zophar, Bildad, and Eliphaz are trying to convince themselves – “we are seeking to follow the Lord and so we are safe from suffering like yours, Job.”    Put in my current language – “I am doing what modern medicine says in healthy for me, so I am safe from serious disease and early death.”  Or “I am kind and level-headed in my conversations with others, so my relationships should be good.  No one could think poorly of my work, intellect or dealings with others.”

Just like Job’s suffering was not tied to the reasons presented by his miserable comforters (which we see at the beginning and end of the book, but Job never learns), it is very likely that the suffering of those around you and me is about much more than science, medicine or relationship help instructions.  God is up to something in his world and people.  We try to shrink what we observe down to where it is small and easy to understand.  His ways are not our ways.  He is always about moving all of creation toward its final destination where His glory and goodness are fully known.  

So I am thankful – for his free gift of salvation that promises me his goodness and grace.  But also that I am reminded that this world is not just about what the physical world can explain.  That he is weaving together ALL of redemptive history into a beautiful masterpiece that this world and its circumstances cannot even comprehend. 

I am a miserable comforter, but I am loved, I am washed, I am redeemed for His glorious purposes.

Life Lessons from Bowl Season

The past 2 years have brought an entirely different perspective on bowls.  As a University of Tennessee fan, there was always 1 bowl that I cared about.  Since we have not been bowl eligible, I have observed other teams and fans in a different light.  A lot of this observation has wrought great irritation in me.  Today, it occurred to me all of the life lessons my children and students could learn from this year’s Bowl Season.

Before I begin, I’ll give my disclaimer:  I am not a football expert.  I am not declaring my view correct in all areas.  So don’t take it personally if you resemble any of my examples below.

 

1. You are not too good for your opponent or your bowl game

I can think of 3 games that I watched this bowl season where some version of the above appeared obvious.  In all 3 cases, the team with this attitude lost the game.  Life is no different – when you have an opportunity in your life, you should take full advantage and work at it with your whole heart.  Any other action is squandering your gifts, talents, and opportunities.

2.  Talent does not win ball games.

The commentators in some games had the audacity to say that all a team had to do was show up and they would win.  They were shown to be very wrong in most cases.  Talent opens doors and gives you opportunity.  But hard work and perseverance are much better indicators of actual success on the field (and in life).

3.  Disrespect is always ugly

Whether it is announcers (see #2), coaches, players or fans, people are made in the image of God and should be treated with respect.  I do not care if you made a good tackle, threw a great pass, or your team just won – this always applies. 

4.  Rankings may not be fair, but it’s the best we can do now – get over it!

Any time someone brings up the word “fair”, it gets under my skin.  Life is not fair and it never will be.  The sooner a person understands this reality, the better off they will be.  I don’t mean to say that we should always accept this state.  Much of the time (in life, especially) we should work to rectify wrongs.  But even then, we will never be able to make things truly fair. 

I may later go into the ultimate of example of things not being fair that we benefit from, but this is not the time or place. 

5.  Basing your fanhood and life’s happiness of the performance of 18 to 22 year olds (pre-adults) is not fair to the players and makes you look ridiculous.

Its easy to forget that the players you see on TV are basically kids.  Would you have wanted nasty emails and public ridicule for the mistakes you made at this age?  Most of us are lucky enough that those mistakes were private or at least seen by only a few people.  Imagine having your mistake viewed by 80,000 people live and then re-lived on ESPN for the next week (or more).  No wonder so many of these kids turn to unhealthy and destructive behaviors.

 

Finally, one other item really struck me today.  I am constantly trying to protect my 2 oldest kids from the evils of social media.  I believe their home should be a place of rest and refuge.  Much of the time, social media can rob them of this.  In one extreme case, my daughter needed to completely close her account and take a break from social media for several months.  Usually I can look at the various views presented in these forums and move on.  But some comments in my News Feed have raised my blood pressure, given me gray hairs, and encouraged me to throw my computer through a window.  I have allowed social media to rob ME of a place of rest and refuge.   I need to take my own advice and remove those ‘friends’ who regularly have this effect.  There may be a time where I find that I need to completely remove myself from social media, and I need to be willing to do that if it is the best thing.