The Trouble with Boo – Part 1

This is the story of a journey I am still struggling through. It started 10 years ago and the plot has thickened in the past year. I write to gain some clarity in what has been occurring and for a record of the events. In March 2000, I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. As she grew, it became obvious that she liked to climb and jump and flip – so we took her to gymnastics class so she would have a safe place to do these things. When she was in kindergarten, the coaches at the gym decided she should move onto the team, so for the past 5 years, Boo has been a competitive gymnast.

Her coach has always wanted to get her to the 'Optional' levels and said she was so talented and a great tumbler. Following the State Meet last year, Boo began to work on new and harder skills. Because of softball and summer travel, she struggled with her back tuck. During this struggle, she learned that she must have the back tuck perfected by August if she wanted to move up to the next level. In addition, she would have to compete as a Level 7 (2 levels higher than the previous year) which had a whole new set of harder skills. During this time we realized Tinley was eating about half of the calories she should have been, so we worked to adjust that part of her routine. At the 'meet' to decide if we moved up or not, Boo scored a 32 All Around, which was enough to bump up. She then began work on the back layout and got routines on all 4 events choreographed just for her. She had a practice meet in late November and it was decided she was ready to compete all routines but bars.

The first meet arrived in December. Boo only competed on Beam and Vault, as her back tumbling had gotten rough. Looking back on this time, I wish I had asked the coach to have her compete or for a little more information. She had done the whole routine only a week or so before. The 2^nd meet of the year was almost a whole month after the first, so Boo was determined to be ready at the next meet. The 2 weeks before Christmas, it seemed that her back tumbling had come together. She was doing both a layout and a tuck without a spot and felt very confident. Then in the second practice after Christmas, she had a small disaster. As she was tumbling, she thought she saw someone about to run into her on floor. She ended up landing on her head. Boo did not compete floor at her meets in January, but started to show promise that she was 'recovering' from the set back in early February. During these same meets her Vault and Beam routines continued to improve - scoring some of the highest scores for her team.  But the "Floor Obstacle" haunted her.  Her coaches were starting to worry that she would not qualify for the State Meet in March. Boo was also worried. The next 5 weeks were up and down – some days were steps in a positive direction and other days were steps back. The meet in Charleston was her last chance to qualify for State – it did not happen.  (Although she had a beautiful beam routine and scored a 9.0 on vault).

Softball practice began soon after the Charleston meet and we have allowed Boo to back off training – from 5 days per week back to 2 or 3. I thought this would relieve the pressure and her tumbling would come more easily. This has not been the case – she is still up and down with her confidence. Today, Eric and I spend a lot of time spotting her in our yard and living room doing back handsprings.

I have never had the opportunity to watch someone I knew very well struggle through something for such a long time. There have been times that I have struggled for an extended time, but I could do something about it. It seems that the more I try to help, the more I hurt the process of Boo regaining her confidence and moving forward in her gymnastics. I have talked with her coaches and some of the gymnasts. I have searched the Internet for ideas and solutions. I have come to find out that a fear of going backwards is not unusual for gymnasts, and that it can drive them from the sport completely. I have also read notes and blogs by some of these people that regret the decision to leave gymnastics over this fear many years later. I have found mp3 recordings using hypnosis to eradicate the fear. I have asked people to pray for her, too. Boo is determined not to quit. She is certainly not having fun now at gym, but she wants to beat this thing! My parenting repertoire is spent at this point. I am playing it by ear, day by day. It is exhausting to support and encourage someone who is frustrated and angry about something you can do nothing to help. But it is possibly practice for how I will need to support my daughter in the future during a more serious and dark time – who knows what the future holds for us?

So I approach each new day with questions – Do I ask if she has thought about how to overcome her fear? Do I remind her that she has to face the fear to beat it? Do I talk more to the coach or less? Do I buy the mp3? Do I not ask any questions and just give her lots of hugs? What if she never beats this? What if she has to leave the gymnastics team? What if she gets hurt?

I can only turn to my Heavenly Father – He knows the answers to all of these questions and He is the only One who loves Boo more than I do. He has not given us a new direction yet – Boo believes, as do we, that she has been gifted to do gymnastics and that she should always seek to glorify Him in her practices and competitions. Who knows when Part 2 of this story will be written and if the plot will take a sudden turn? Until then, pray for us – for direction and insight, and patience.